The "Sand Dunes and Salty Air" Edition :: Issue #046

Rusty’s Electric Dreams :: Issue #046 :: The “Sand Dunes and Salty Air” Edition :: 08:19:2015

Rusty’s Electric Dreams, an inbox zine by pop culture activist Rusty BlazenhoffIssue #046 :: The “Sand Dunes and Salty Air” Edition :: 08:19:2015

Sand dunes and salty air…

:: Gone “fishin'” ::

— Rusty Blazenhoff

p.s. See you next week!

“One of the most inspiring, weird and off-kilter collections of curated kitschy ephemera for the big-brained.”

—Mighty on Product Hunt

[Have something nice to say? Say it and I’ll include it on my Press page.]

This space intentionally left Cape Coddy

As seen on the Internets

“Old Cape Cod” by Patti Page

:: The Clifton’s Cafeteria remodel is finally done! Opens 9/17! Thx, Allison!:: http://www.lamag.com/longform/behold-the-fantastical-new-cliftons/

:: White Shark 0: Seal 1 Thx, Swainer!

:: https://youtu.be/4M9X8Q-vfVA

:: The Art of the Title: Pee-wee’s Playhouse

:: http://www.artofthetitle.com/title/pee-wees-playhouse/

:: Hey, wanna go in on renting Grey Gardens next summer with me?

:: http://hamptons.curbed.com/grey_gardens.php

:: Great Huffpo article on Tiki Oasis!

:: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jim-hill/15th-anniversary-edition.html

Artist-in-residence: August 2015

Kid Rockwell by Mark Blackwell

Adventures in Online Dating: Foot Pr0n Star

Part three…Squirrel!

I’m in the tub scrubbing the piggies for my foot pr0n photo shoot when the lights go out.

On texting, the foot pr0n guy says his lights are on, so I get in my car, back out, hit the remote for the gate. Hit the remote for the gate. Hit the remote for the electric gate. “Doh!”

I text him my dilemma; he responds: “No problem, Iâ€™ll come get you. Where are you?”

But wait! No! I don’t want him to know where I live or rely on him for transpo.

“I feel more comfortable with my own car, I hope you understand.”

And the asshole reveals himself: “I don’t understand. I’ve answered all your safety concerns. I’m a professional. I’m insulted really.”

Well, ok then¦

“I’ve decided against doing this.” It was the only possible call, right?

Now, the power went out that night for 45000 people, and turns out his place was squarely within that area. Shooting pr0n requires light–but killing someone, tickle-raping then removing and taxidermying their feet? That can be done in the dark.

I also found out later that a single squirrel rampaged into the power station and caused the outage. I like to think that as he charged he yelled, “I’LL SAVE YOU, CHERRYYYYYY!” (I also like to think I am under the not always effective protection of squirrels.) Did that brave squirel in fact kill a promising career in foot pr0n? Or save my life?

We’ll never know.

Part one can be found here.
Part two can be found here.

—Cherry Terror

Cherry “Terror” Zonkowski is a local writer and storyteller; she has performed all over the Bay Area at Bawdy Storytelling, the Marsh, Fireside and more. Check out her tweet stream @cherryterror.

Have a question about online dating you’d like Cherry to answer? Send her an email: cherryterror@gmail.com

Special thanks to Dave Cherry for this week’s Adventure in Online Dating art!

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It’s not a cult. YET.

Events of note

My dad’s in the front seat. Taken in the early 1950s in front of the Sandy Neck lighthouse.

United States[August] Everyhere Logistics’ roadtrip

Alameda, California

[8/22] Wine, Women, and Song at Rhythmix

Austin, Texas

[10/9-10/12] Camp Grounded

Black Rock City, Nevada

[8/30-9/7] Burning Man

Chatham, Massachusetts

[8/25] Jazz Festival – Sarah Swain

Edinburgh, UK

[Until 8/31] Edinburgh Festival Fringe

Fairfield, California

[9/26-9/27] Candypalooza at Jelly Belly Factory

Germany

[8/16-12/16] The World of Tim Burton at Max Ernst Museum BrÃ¼hl des LVR

Henderson, North Carolina

[8/27-8/30] Camp Grounded, “Where Grownups Go to Unplug, Get Away, and Be Kids Again.”

Lake Iseo, Italy

[6/18/16 to 7/3/16] Christo’s Floating Piers (Who wants to go?!)

Las Vegas

[Ongoing] Akhob, an immersive “Ganzfeld effect” experience by artist James Turrell at Louis Vuitton [by appt only: 702-730-3150] HIGHLY recommended!

London

[Until 9/27] Secret Cinema Presents Star Wars [Tickets]

[July 2016] EVA London 2016

Los Angeles

[8/22] Pee-wee’s Big Adventure showing at Hollywood Forever Cemetery, 7:15 PM door [Tickets]
Rumor has it that Paul Reubens will be there![

TBD September] ALONE | Reflection[TBD October] ALONE | Absorbtion

[9/23] Mortified: a night of adults telling stories about their lives by sharing their most mortifying childhood artifacts (diaries, letters, lyrics, poems, home movies)â€¦ in front of total strangers.

Lucca, Italy

[10/29-11/1] Lucca Comics & Games 2015

Marrakech, Morocco

[9/11-9/13] Oasis

New York City

[9/26-9/27] World Maker Faire New York [Tickets]

Oakland

[9/26] Grace Jones at Fox Theater [Tickets][10/24] FIGMENT Oakland, a free, inclusive, participatory art event

Paris

[10/10] Danny Elfman’s Music from the Films of Tim Burton

Pasadena, California
[11/21-11/22] Designercon

Portland, Oregon
[9/3-9/4] Mortified: a night of adults telling stories about their lives by sharing their most mortifying childhood artifacts (diaries, letters, lyrics, poems, home movies)â€¦ in front of total strangers.

Provincetown, Massachusetts
[until 8/21] Carnival 2015: Candy Land

Riverside, California
[9/18-9/20] Boing Boing’s Weekend of Wonder at Mission Inn

[5/20-5/22/16] Beyond Brookledge at Mission Inn

San Francisco
[8/20] “Meet Mr. Product” at Oddball Films, 275 Capp Street, $10, Limited Seating RSVP to RSVP@oddballfilm.com or (415) 558-8117

[8/22] The Real Numbers at International Pop Overthrow Festival, Hotel Utah

[8/22] Charles Phoenix “Retro Disneyland slideshow” at the Walt Disney Family Museum

[8/26] The Dancehall of Beautiful Radiant Things at Verdi Club, 8 PM
Use the code word “dreams” for 20% off your ticket purchase

[9/9] Fireside Storytelling: Storyteller’s Choice, 8 PM, Chez Poulet, $15

[9/16] Bawdy Storytelling: “Sapiosexual” [Save the date]

[9/19] San Francisco Comedy Competition

[9/27] Folsom Street Fair

[10/2-10/4] Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival 2015

[10/7] Fireside Storytelling: Saved the Day, 8 PM, Chez Poulet, $15

[10/29] TEDxSanFrancisco at Pier 70

[11/2015] Flying Robot international Film Festival (submissions taken until 9/15)

[11/4] Fireside Storytelling: Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, 8 PM, Chez Poulet, $15

[12/3] Fireside Storytelling: Mind. Blown., 8 PM, Chez Poulet, $15

[12/31] PATTI SMITH & HER BAND perform Horses in its entirety this New Year’s Eve at The Fillmore! [Tickets]

Santa Fe, New Mexico
[9/4] Zozobra

Seattle
“The Obscure, the Charming and the Odd: Mark Pahlow’s Guide to Seattle”

Spain
[7/4-7/10/16] Nowhere

Heads up!~~ [10/9-10/11] Kinky Salon. DEEP HEDONISM. Secret location

Want to speak for Odd Salon? Fill out this form.

If YOU would like to co-curate an issue of Rusty’s Electric Dreams, I’d love to hear your idea! Please email me: rusty@blazenhoff.com.

Know about a cool event? Share it. I’ll do my best to include it in the next issue.

Apply to the DENT conference scholarship program.

“The world is my lobster.” –Henry J. Tillman

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Rusty’s Electric Dreams is a weekly inbox zine by Rusty Blazenhoff. These personally curated missives are beacons to signal and celebrate the global tribe of weird, wonderful, and “different” people (“the Others“).

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