The “That time I peed in someone’s car” :: Issue #079


Rusty’s Electric Dreams :: Issue #079 :: The “That time I peed in someone’s car” Edition :: 04:06:2016

Rusty's Electric Dreams

Rusty’s Electric Dreams, an inbox zine by professional free spirit Rusty Blazenhoff
Issue #079 :: The “That time I peed in someone’s car” Edition :: 04:06:2016

That time I peed in someone’s car…

I’m going to share a story with you. Recently, after a birthday celebration for a dear friend (from “back in the day”), the subject came around to that time I “peed” in someone’s car.

We’ll call this someone, “Dis Schmadliffe.”

For a few months in the mid-to-late 1990s, there was a rumor going around the (greater Burning Man) community that I had peed in his older-model Mercedes. Every party I went to, someone was sure to bring it up to me in disbelief.

“I heard you peed in Schmadliffe’s CAR…?!”

And, if he was at the same party, people would warn me to leave.

During that time, I was in my mid-twenties and I was hanging out with a rather “cacophonous” crowd. During the day, I was working at a print and copy shop in Oakland owned by the wife of “Dis Schmadliffe.” To get the job, I had promised “Dis” that I could learn Quark in a week from a book. I had been unemployed long enough at that time that selling my eggs were looking like a real option. Learning graphic design software cold in a week seemed like the less-invasive route. It was and it wasn’t.

There was always drama at the print shop. Always. Yelling, screaming, you name it.

Me being naive me, I seemed to be the one accidentally asking the uncomfortable questions out loud, “Why does it smell like booze in here?”

“Why are there bottles of liquor in this desk drawer?”

“Why are the paychecks late again?”

Then, early-early one morning, I got a phone call, you know, on the landline. The voice on the other end was YELLING at me. “How DARE you!? I’ll KILL you!”

I recognized the voice, it was “Schmadliffe.”

I was scared. I asked him what he was talking about.

“My wife told me what you did!! You KEYED my car because you didn’t get PAID!!”

KEYED. Not PEED. And, I wasn’t guilty of THAT either. Yet, like a screwy game of Telephone, the legend of “Rusty Blazenhoff urinating in Schmadliffe’s car” grew and grew in the community and there was little I could do to stop it.

Later, after avoiding him for months socially, he showed up at a toaster event I was co-hosting. He started walking over to me and I froze. He walked up to me, hugged me, and said he was sorry. “That lying whore told me what REALLY happened to my car. She got drunk and drove it into a ditch. The brush scratched one side of it.”

“Anyway, sorry. I’m divorcing her.”

Mark my words, dear readers, I guarantee there are still people who think I took out my “revenge” in his vintage ride.

Ah, the good ol’ days

Anyhoo, last week I was all of you to tell me “something good.” A lot of you did. Thank you. Your responses ranged from quirky to informative to beaming-with-pride to nearly-intelligible-but-full-of-heart. Each and every one was glorious.

This week, I’d like you to take one photo — just one — of the inside your home’s medicine cabinet and share it with me. This time, I may share your response (let me know if you DON’T want a photo credit). Alternately, the photo can be of the inside your freezer, cereal cabinet, or silverware drawer.

New month, new Artist-in-Residence: Carollyne Yardley, master of Squirrealism!

Rusty Blazenhoff

p.s.  Interesting side note: the print and copy shop I was working at back then was where the tickets for Burning Man were copied. Yes, copied. For a while, in the early days, they were Xeroxed on a big machine in downtown Oakland. Somewhere around here I have an uncut sheet of 1997 tickets.

“Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.”

Powerpuffed me
This space intentionally left powerpuffed

As seen on the Internets


Artist Briancoshock turned abandoned manhole covers in Milan into miniature rooms

:: Artist Briancoshock turned abandoned manhole covers in Milan into mini rooms

:: “The Genius of Weirdness: What Frank Zappa Taught Me, and What We Can Still Learn”

:: Microdosing Cannabis Thanks, Epiph!

:: “Goat Rituals and Tree-Trunk Gravestones: The Peculiar History of Life Insurance”

:: My friend Petrina is rescuing abandoned dogs in the Oakland Hills

:: “Mom Weed,” a sketch on Jimmy Kimmel

Artist-in-Residence: Carollyne Yardley


Trophy Wife

Flower Beard, 40″ x 40″, oil on panel, 2015. Private Collection.
Why Do Historical Painting have so many squirrels in them?

“…At least one answer is easy to find. Squirrels were kept as pets in the Middle Ages and Renaissance, as Kathleen Walker-Meikle notes in Medieval Pets: Even if it came from a species that had little intrinsic monetary value, an animal could be transformed into a pampered pet of exalted status by adorning it with elaborate accessories…” [Read more]

“In Flower Beard, Carollyne Yardley reinterprets the Renaissance fondness for painting squirrels sitting next to big bowls of fruit, the fluffy rodent often associated with feminine virtues and natural bounty. Yardley’s squirrel dons a flower beard, a phenomenon that spread across the internet in 2014 involving bushy bearded blokes adorning their faces with elegant arrangements in a whimsical joke that flipped masculine facial hair on it’s head. Squirrels, flowers, and beards coalesce into a playful exploration of gender stereotypes. By placing her self-branded “Squirrealism” at the intersection of Renaissance masters and hipster dudes, Yardley weaves her own history into the fabric of time, wryly treating herself as the canon to be parodied.”

Laurie White, Analogue Magazine, Dec/Jan 2016

Carollyne Yardley coined the term Squirrealism to describe her signature style of fine artwork using squirrel masks in paintings, to create strange, transgene characters, and creatures. The “mask” has become a symbol describing misfits, hiding behind animated personas, odd and beautifully unusual. She is currently exploring character development through the repetition of imagery, brand development, identity, memes, pop culture, and absurdity.

Events of note

Nemo Gould's Megalodon
[4/4-4/23] INTRUDE, a large-scale public artwork of giant inflatable illuminated rabbits by Tasmanian artist Amanda Parer, Civic Center Plaza, San Francisco
Various cities in the USA
[Until 4/23] Lily Tomlin

[Until 4/25] Puddles Pity Party

Global Psychedelic Dinners [Find a table]

[4/16] Atlas Obscura Day

[3/2017] Spannabis

East Park Reservoir in Colusa County, California
[5/20-5/26] Camp Tipsy, an “annual rotten boat building contest and camp-out”

Houston, Texas
[4/9] The 29th Annual Houston Art Car Parade

Lake Iseo, Italy
[6/18 to 7/3] Christo’s Floating Piers

Las Vegas
[Ongoing] Akhob, an immersive “Ganzfeld effect” experience by artist James Turrell at Louis Vuitton [by appt only: 702-730-3150]  HIGHLY recommended!

Desert beyond Las Vegas
[4/29-5/1] Further Future Festival [Tickets]

Lisbon, Portugal
[11/7-11/10] Web Summit 2016

[July 2016] EVA London 2016

Los Angeles

Cool Places to Buy Weird Shit in Los Angeles

[4/9] “Hooray L.A.” gala with Charles Phoenix at the Bob Baker Marionette Theater, 8 PM [Tickets]

[4/13] Serial Killer Speed Dating at BarFood LA, 8 – 10 PM

[Dates through 4/30] Mojo Maps, Interactive Theatre and Urban Adventure created by a former Disney Imagineer

[Until 5/12] Hooray for L.A.A full Marionette Musical Variety Hour at Bob Baker Marionette Theater [Tickets]

[5/29] E.T., the Extra Terrestrial screening at Hollywood Forever Cemetery

[8/14] BrunchCon LA at The Reef, 9 AM to 3 PM Thanks, Josh!

[12/5-12/8] Henry Rollins at Largo

Marble Falls, Texas
[10/7-10/10] Camp Grounded

Melbourne, Australia
beinArt Gallery opens in early 2016

New Orleans
[2/28/2017] Mardi Gras
[2/13/2018] Mardi Gras
[3/5/2019] Mardi Gras
[2/25/20] Mardi Gras

New York City
Quirky NYC by Oriana Leckert:
“From Bumper Cars to Torah Taxidermy: A Guide to 25 of Brooklyn’s Most Unusual Museums”
“From Elevators to Outsider Art: A Guide to 16 Under-the-Radar Museums in Queens”

[Until 5/26] Then She Fell, a “fully immersive, multi-sensory experience in which only 15 audience members per performance explore a dreamscape where every alcove, corner, and corridor has been transformed into a lushly designed world”

[Ongoing] Sleep No More at The McKittrick Hotel
[Ongoing] Jungle-Ized by Sound Collective, Free
[Ongoing] The Ferry Play on the Staten Island Ferry, $1.99
[Ongoing] More NYC events


[4/16-9/25] Altered State: Marijuana in California at OMCA

[4/17] MAPS 30th Anniversary Banquet & Celebration at Scottish Rite Center

[4/20] The Dancehall of Beautiful Radiant Things at Fratellanza Club [Emeryville], 7:30 PM to 10:30 PM [Tickets]

[4/23] 2016 Bay Area Anarchist Book Fair, 10 AM to 6 PM

[6/25-6/26] Burger Boogaloo, Mosswood Park [Tickets]

Palm Springs, California
[7/8-7/11] Yes and Yes Yes (YxYY) at the Ace Hotel, a “summer retreat for anyone who considers themselves a thinker, maker, creator, nerd, or weirdo.” [Tickets]

Paris, France
Editor’s note:
Last January I had the good fortune to spend the night in an artist’s yurt. My photos from that visit will be included in this show…in PARIS!
[4/13-8/29] Habiter le Campement, Cité de l’architecture & du patrimoine au Palais de Chaillot

Portland, Oregon
[8/11-8/15] World Domination Summit [Tickets]

Provincetown, Massachusetts
[8/13-8/19] Carnival 2016: Back to the 80’s

Riverside, California
[5/20-5/22] Beyond Brookledge at the Galleria at the Mission Inn

San Francisco
“Best storytelling events in the Bay Area”
[Ongoing] Elsewhere Philatelic Society
[Ongoing] More SF events

[4/4-4/23] INTRUDE, a large-scale public artwork by Tasmanian artist Amanda Parer, Civic Center Plaza

[4/8] Survival Research Labs (SRL) is bringing machines to The Minnesota Street Project, Capital Gallery, 6 PM to 9 PM

[4/12] Odd Salon: Quest at DNA Lounge

[4/13] Fireside Storytelling: “Achilles Heel” at Chez Poulet, 7:30 PM Doors, $15

[4/14] Yuri’s NightLife at California Academy of Sciences with Space Cowboys, 6 PM to 10 PM [Tickets]

[4/14-4/15] The Chocolate and Art Show at SOMarts

[4/15] Bawdy Storytelling: “Sex, Drugs, and Rock & Roll” at 7 PM [Tickets]
“Nerdgasm” at 10:30 PM [Tickets], both at the Verdi Club

[4/16] Perpetual Motion Grand Opening (inc. Nemo Gould’s â€œMegalodon”) at Heron Arts (exhibits through 5/14)

[4/20] Screening of “Blueberry Soup” at Chez Poulet [Tickets]

[4/21-4/24] The Gray Area Festival, a conference, performances, workshops, and an exhibition surveying culture through the lens of art and technology

[4/27] Mermaid Swim San Francisco

[4/29-5/1] stARTup Art Fair at Hotel del Sol

[5/1] How Weird 2016: The Cosmic Stew, [Tickets]

[5/5] Jason Mecier’s “Celebrity Trash” at 111 Minna

[5/11] Fireside Storytelling: “Gotta Bail” at Chez Poulet, 7:30 PM Doors, $15

[5/16] SFMOMA to reopen

[6/5] Space Age slide show with Charles Phoenix at Grand Star Theater, 3 PM [Tickets]

[6/11-10/2] Cindy Sherman: Imitation of Life at The Broad [pdf]

[6/12-6/13] Season finale of Calling All Choir at Mission Dolores Basilica

[6/12] Mac Sabbath at Slim’s, 8 PM, all ages [Tickets]

[6/24-6/26] New Games with John Law

[7/10] Cocktail Robotics Grand Challenge at DNA Lounge [Tickets]

[7/23] The Murray Invitational. A Bill Murray Art Exhibition and Golf Party at Public Works

[8/5-8/7] Outside Lands, Golden Gate Park

[10/13] Brian Wilson presents Pet Sounds – Celebrating the 50th Anniversary, 8 PM [Tickets]

[10/2017] 50th Anniversary of the Summer of Love

SF Bay Area
[Ongoing] Best swimming holes in the SF Bay Area

San Diego, California
[8/18-8/21] Tiki Oasis: “Monster Island”

San Mateo, California
[5/20-5/22] The 11th Annual Maker Faire Bay Area [Tickets]

San Rafael, California
[5/7] David Sedaris at Marin Veterans’ Memorial Auditorium, 8 PM [Tickets]

Santa Fe, New Mexico
[Ongoing] Meow Wolf [Read this] [Tickets]

The Obscure, the Charming and the Odd: Mark Pahlow’s Guide to Seattle

[7/4-7/10] Nowhere

Tacoma, Washington
[4/11] Internet Cat Video Festival at the Grand Cinema [Tickets]
If YOU would like to co-curate an issue of Rusty’s Electric Dreams, I’d love to hear your idea! Please email me:

Know about a cool event? Share it. I’ll do my best to include it in the next issue.

The Houndstooth Glitch by Doc Pop for Betabrand


Foma Labs, Immersive Experiences

“I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.”

Rusty’s Electric Dreams is a weekly inbox zine by Rusty Blazenhoff. These personally-curated missives are beacons to signal and celebrate the global tribe of weird, wonderful, and “different” people (“the Others“).

:: Read the Archives ::
:: Send a Tip ::






Copyright © , All rights reserved.

You are amazing.